It Has Arrived

My book. It is in my hands. I walk around the backyard staring at it, taking it in. It is real. A thing I have dreamed about but could never truly imagine. It is real. I spend about ten minutes by myself walking around the coral tree, stopping by the sage, feeling the cover, opening to random pages and reading. It is mine. I made this thing.

I am not a parent. I've never birthed a child. This is the closest thing to a child I've had. And it's no coincidence that it took nine months to write after fifteen years of musing, writing, outlining, living, grieving, loving, growing up and growing down. I have done something big and sweet and finally all mine. I am touched deeply by the many loves, lives and hands that it has taken to get me here. I miss my parents, but I know that if they were still here, this book would not be in my hands.  

I am flooded with love and bittersweet longing.

A Little Bit of Calm

Breathing. 

In. 
Out.

After a crazy month readying my solo show for the Lucy Comedy Festival in Jamestown, I now have a few weeks to find my center before the seriously chaotic book promotion begins.  

I am truly looking forward to my first book being out in the world. But I am not looking forward to talking about it over and over again. I am hoping to find a way to talk about the things that truly fascinate me about this journey - balancing independence with familial loyalty; trusting spontaneous creativity while holding onto a vision; struggling with my vulnerability while yearning to unfold my inner self for all the world to see. 

This is all new territory for me. I do not have a map. But hey, when you're joy riding, who needs a map?