So it is 7-7-07 today. Never will it be this again. That sounds a bit dramatic, but there is something to say about really acknowledging the weight of any one moment. I don’t know if I could sustain doing that 24/7, but as a slightly regular practice it could be a good thing.
I remember being around 7 or 8 years old and standing in front of a full-length mirror looking at myself, and the something in the moment just washed over me and hit me. I stood there looking, really looking at myself, and a voice inside me said, “This is really it. This is not a dream. This is really my life, and it is real, I am real, and I am living it.” A whoosh of a breeze moved through the inside of me, a hard reality settled in, yet I was suddenly free of something that had confined me before. I was at the same moment both more outside and inside my own life.
I still have moments like this every once and a while. But I must admit, I fear them on some level because when I have them, there is some kind of harsh reality that does blow through me, and my ego/persona/personality gets exposed as the mask it is, and I see into the bigger reality of what is and what could be if I just let go of it. I am both attracted and repelled by this reality. I know ultimately it is what I really am, and yet, here I am, living this life, the life of Kelly Carlin-McCall. Both are true, and yet both are not.
So today, with this one day that is here and now, I am going to live it as present as I can be. I will stay connected to the BIG Reality while I watch hours of Live Earth concerts coming into my living room from seven continents, and celebrate the beginning of the Tour de France’s 94th start .
So, enjoy this 7-7-07, and remember, never will it be this again. Think green and go Discovery Team!
Saturday, July 07, 2007
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